6:00- stumble out of bed, and quickly try to prepare myself for the day before I have to wake E.
6:40- wake up Elliott, who stumbles out of bed and wraps his arms and legs around me in the biggest morning hug ever
6:45- fight with Elliott over him taking off his pajamas and diaper so that I can send him to the bathroom
6:50- After an enthusiastic "I did it", try (unsuccessfully) to get Elliott to finish, because if he doesn't then I will be changing his underwear and starting a load of laundry before leaving the house
6:55- Decide that if he won't finish, he won't get to put on the bottom half of his outfit until he does. Elliott decides that the world is crumbling immediately afterward.
6:57- Decide to leave the hollering lump of child in the bathroom floor and take myself (and the bottom half of Elliott's outfit) upstairs to get coffee, breakfast, and lunches together.
7:00- Feed pumpkin oatmeal to a half naked little boy. He gleefully finishes all of it, and then dumps a glass of milk on the table. "Wha happen a milk?" Proceed to clean up milk, and then deposit said half naked little boy on the potty seat so we can finally go to work.
7:01- Half naked little boy proudly proclaims "He did it!" Which he did. Proceed to dress him and try to shuffle us out the door.
7:10- Remember he needs to have his medicine. And he wants to carry his bunch box (not a typo). Almost leave the house without his coat. When he has to put down the bunch box to put on his coat, he falls apart again.
7:12- Take deep breaths before scraping the mess of a child off the floor, stuff him into a coat, carry him to the car and proceed to work.
7:55- Finally get to work. Haul Elliott to his class, where he proceeds to sit just outside of the doorway and look at me like "What are you going to do now?" Luckily his saint of a preschool teacher interceded for me. I love her.
Entire day at school and work goes by.
4:01- Walk in Elliott's class and am greeted with a hug that involves both arms and legs. Notice that he is miraculously in the same underwear I sent him to school in! Smell something weird.
4:02- Go change Elliott's clothes.
4:10- Go to pick up David to enjoy this gorgeous weather we are having. Make sure a backup change of clothes is in my bag
4:20- Wait outside of parking garage for David. Avoid weird people and hide from the panhandlers. Explain what a motorized wheelchair is.
4:25- Notice a ladybug lands in Elliott's hair. This means good luck! Carefully remove it and let it crawl across my hands so that Elliott can see. Explain that he must be gentle, but he can touch it.
4:27- Casually remove the squished ladybug from Elliott's hand and wonder how much bad luck that means. "Wha happen a lady bug?"
4:30-6:15- Have a wonderful meal with David and Elliott in the sunshine. Decide to press my luck and meet some friends afterward.
6:25-7:30- Unsuccessfully try to explain personal boundaries, why Elliott can't climb on other people, why we can't jump on the booth in the restaurant, and eventually hand him off to David.
Once in David's lap, he is still and quiet for 10 minutes. David hands him back. He immediately resumes acting like a chimpanzee. Decide to go home.
8:00- Agree with Elliott that I'm tired too, and we are going straight home to go to bed.
8:05- Brush Elliott's teeth and ruin his life by doing so. Not that I did anything unusual or painful. He just didn't want his teeth brushed, and I didn't let him win that one.
8:06- Take lots of deep breaths. Finish getting him ready and put him in bed.
8:08- In between dramatic sobs, hear "I wanna go night night, Mommy". After telling him, "Then go night night", hear him actually say "No, I wanna go night night with Mommy" and decide that he's sad, and tired, and my baby. I'm not sure how long he will actually want me to lay down with him while he settles down. So I tucked him in, snuggled in beside him, and watched him settle himself down and fall asleep. And then I (almost) forgot about the rest of that other stuff.
The end.
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